General

Urinalysis

It’s a snowy day and American President steps out onto the White House grass. Right in front of him, on the White House grass, he sees “Donald Trump sucks!” written in urine across the snow.

Donald is pretty annoyed about this so he storms into his security staff’s headquarters, and shouts, “Somebody wrote an insult in the snow on the front damn lawn! And they wrote it with pee! Whoever did it had to be standing right on the porch when he did it! Where were you guys?!”

The security personnels are in silence and stare ashamedly at the floor.

Trump yells, “Damnation!, don’t just sit there! Get out and find out who did it! I want an answer, and I want it tonight!”

The entire staff immediately jump up and race for the exits.

Later that night, chief security officer approaches him and says, “Well Mr. President, we have some bad news and we have some really bad news. Which do you want to hear first?”

Trump replies, “Give me the bad news first.”

The officer says, “Well, we took a sample of the urine and tested it. The results just came back, and it was Mike Pence’s urine.”

Donald says, “Oh Jesus, I feel so… so… betrayed! My own vice president! Well, what’s the really bad news?”

The security chief replies, “Well Mr. President, it’s Melania’s handwriting.”



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